(Before I go on a tyrantic rave about bad juju [you'll know why], I just want to point out that I'm a happy person right now, and my day was pretty normal. Went to school, took test [which I think I did SUPER good on], hung out with girl, went to Adam+Mandy's house, came home, played video games with Ed until now. Gunna sleep after this, good stuff!)Devious activity... everyone has thought about it at some point in there lives. Whether or not it comes to life with action is within discretion of the holder , but none the less still alive in the mind. Those who come to face the inner conflict and pursue a battle only known inside oneself possess a better understanding of the harsh realities which this world plagues the human mind... this 'pestilence' that can never truly be cured. It will NEVER be conqured... just temporarily subdued by the order of worldly-acceptable thought. As long as there is purity and good, so will the existence of taint and evil... but what defines these two powerful and emotionally moving words? Everyone is plentiful aware that there must be a balance... but to what degree?
- breaching the age of consent for sex (which ranges from about 14 in Spain, 16 in Canada, 18 in America)
- animal cruelity (in America, it's minor physical blows; in China, it's litterally delivering a deathblow to the subject... but law does not protect them from beatings and starving within captivity [the fur trade production is manipulating this loophole])
- child abuse (in america, this applies at a verbal level, and scales accordingly; in most of Europe, it's extreme physical malformity [major contusions, deep lacerations, serious fungal/bacterial infections due to negligence, etc])
- the basis of morality (in America, it's being Anglo-saxon (or Puritan) good; in Africa, being good is in the form of 'Might is Right' and vigilante-based actions)
- religion (Do I REALLY need to list examples? Look in the history books, and current day)
- rights of women (in America... well, enough said. In most 2nd/3rd world countries, they are only used for breeding machines and punching bags)
- regulation of law (in America, cops have to read your rights and act with civility; in Australia, if you've done bad, people make sure karma happens real quick-like)
- suicide (in America, it's identified with depression or extreme regret; in Japan, culture infuses this with [dis]honor or shame to the family name)
- Et cetera
The perception of 'right' and 'wrong' is altered according to where one may live. If someone steals in America, cops arrest you, ask questions, and it will possibly be on your records; in about 10-15% of the rest of the world, you'll be missing a segment of your (if not an entire) finger(s).
Personal example, I've had a nice share of the fish in the sea, many in which were "meaningful overnight relationships". I never thought once that any of my actions were 'bad', cause they were clearly justified by willingness of the opposite party. Let me include that most women were in complete understanding of the situation that was presented, and some of those women had stipulations of what they would expect from the event, and what is not to be accepted. Now... other people conceive those types of men as manipulative, lieing, misleading, insensitive (to a womens needs), wrongful behavior, the list goes on. All those words sound awefully negative, don't they? Possibly... 'bad'? Hmmm... it's about perspective ultimately.
In another personal example (the reason why this topic surfaced)... I have many contacts in the school grounds, many of which I talk to outside of the learning atmosphere. There are a few people particullarly in my interests, and I'm beggining to focus my attention at an emotional level. A girl friend of mine (She WILL remain anonamous) and I were hanging out after school, talking about how sex is important to the human body, and she started crying. At first, it was just weeping... could have been confused with something unrelated and minor... then she full-out, busted open the waterworks in her face, and began an extremely deep crying. I ignored the wrestler-headbutt she delivered to my shoulder, and hugged her, rubbing her back. I wasn't saying anything at that point... just quietly trying to sooth her while thinking what the hell just happened. After a few minutes (and many tissues), she reverted back to involuntary sniffling... I decided to ask what made her feel upset. I knew it wasn't dealing with me, so I was out of the loop. She said she thought of her uncle when I was talking about sex. I was starting to connect the dots then... a sudden realization of things. She then described that he raped her when she was about ten, and made it a regular activity till she was about fifteen. She was curious about her own body at the time, and was experimenting with masterbation on and off. One day, he walked in on her while performing. She obviously screamed and freaked out... and then he asked her if she needed help. She said no, but he said she would want to have him help her, or he would tell all her friends and family that she touches herself. She accepted him to 'help'. At first, it was mere coaching (voyerism), which in turn progressed into petting and touching, and morphed into intercourse. This happened all within the timespan of about three months. He would slap her around lightly while performing (face, ass, sides), including minor suffocation, rough throwing (on the bed/cushion), and yelling. Now.... I was still confused somewhat... I asked her "How does talking about our sexual lives NOW relate?" She replied with "Cause I can't get an orgasm or turned on without feeling like I'm being forcefully raped the entire time, and I don't know how to stop it" ...and the crying started back up again... no massive headbutt this time, just a soft face with wetness encrouching my shoulder sleeve. She's a nice girl, but there's a deep pathology in the working... and she's doing it to herself. I would assume that in feeling guilty with the rape for a sexual experience with men she meets, it would be like reliving the situation to try and come to terms with what happened, or how to solve the problem... but that's my theory. I'm not hardely certified nor experienced (at that level) to deal with sensitive information, so I offered that we can look for a therapist together. It might motivate her into talking to a professional about it, but she said she'll think about it. I then shared some information with how I could relate to what she was saying, and how I delt with it. She's a nice girl, really... just a dark skeleton I would never expect... blessed be her soul.
At times, "Innocent until proven guilty" is just a saying.
At times, people act on the inibitions of sin.
Learn to forgive and to never forget.
Or the circle of violence grows.
Evermore...
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